not so late night rambling -

its not as late as usual at least - I am tired!!!

I have been long over due to get back here and post, however I have been so busy that I have not had the chance to.

Life is good for the most part!!! We are poor as paupers this summer with having all three kids home and eating us out of house and home over the summer. My husband finally understood why I have been so overwhelmed with our food budget when he went to the store for milk and bread and spent 10 dollars just on the two items. NOW he understands!!!!

I went and got a temp job at this new store that is opening up across the street from my home. It is a Bi-Mart. I am really enjoying the experience - once I stopped feeling like it was a major step back to take the job I realized I was doing what I could to help my family and that is more important - that and reminding myself this is a temp job and I am not quitting college to pursue a career in retail HAHA!!!

I have been working 8 hour days but they are a very busy 8 hours and I come home simply exhasted. I stay up as late as I can so I can visit with my husband and kids and enjoy some cool air but by about 10ish I can't manage to keep my eyes open and fall into bed.

ITS ALMOST TIME FOR SCHOOL TO RESUME!!!!

As a senior I have had the opportunity to develop friendships with other students - and I have to say I really miss them. However, I can tell that summer break is coming to a close because recently I have started recieving emails asking if I am ready for school to start up and if I am getting antsy - my answer is YES!!!!! I am ready for this year to start - I am soooooooo VERY VERY VERY excited. Nervous too - but very excited!!!

I am looking forward to working for one of my professors as a co-op student. I am really really looking forward to working in groups with two of my classmates AND I am very very much so looking forward to my internship - I am so nervous and so worried but at the same time - I am so excited because this is where I will see if it is a good fit for me - I am putting into practice all the information that my professors have been trying to impress on us.

sooo - thats about it - things that are running through my head before it hits the pillow -

I hope that you all have a wonderful night and until next time - Take care!

Baby Steps Right??? Another step ventured

I have been in control of the finances for over 10 years - and my husband acts like I am keeping him from enjoying stuff such as new books and movies - and well I never really let him in on how tight funds were - not trying to be secretive - just didn't want to burden him

Last night after balancing the checkbook and seeing that we were going to be short again this payperiod I said a quick prayer and then went to hubbie with checkbook in hand -

I told him that I was really having a hard time because with the prices of everything we are strapped financially and unless something changes I didn't see it getting better - we were 300 in the hole and every payday was just robbing peter to pay paul - I showed him that all we have been spending money on is food and gas and bills - no extras -

He and I talked and he goes - okay I will call the bank tomorrow and see what we can do -

He called them - they refinanced our truck loan and gave us 500 AND lowered our payment by 70 dollars a month!!!!! WAHOOOOO! PLUS we don't have a payment until the end of next month - this months payment was due on Friday.

And the bestpart is - I think my husband understands that I am not being mean and telling him no - and I feel better not having to bear the burden -

sorry I haven't updated

I am kind of busy acting like a newly-wed again!!!!

Falling in love with the man I love all over again - so forgive me that I haven't been around -

enjoy this picture for now though -

an update of sorts

there have been some awsome changes in my marraige! One of the biggest issues between dh and I was that I always took back seat to his job - if we were out and someone ran out of propane - they called him and he never ignored it - even though there are 4 other drivers between the two districts -

DH actually talked to his boss - for the past 8 years that he has worked for the company he has been on call 24/7 - even when we are on vacation - (which he got called last year while we were on vacation)

all the other guys either don't answer their phones or " have had a beer" and can't go out. If no one answers then they ALL get written up -Therefore, my husband felt responsible to take all the calls - so they (call center) started just calling him for both districts rather than rotating it.

unfortunately this meant we couldn't make plans for anything at night or on the weekends. He has gotten called out in the middle of birthday parties, christmas eve - anniversary - and it has become a very sore point between the two of us.

ANYWAYS - back to the changes - he talked to his suppervisor and told her that his job was causing a lot of stress between us because we weren't able to spend or plan anything meaningful more than one weekend a year because the other guys were not holding up their ends of the bargains

She listened and they had a meeting - One guy is on call for both districts for a week- if they don't answer their phone or don't take the run- then they get written up - 2 write ups means no raise for the year - 3 means you get fired - So he will only be on call 1 week a month rather than constantly WAHOOOOO!!!!

First thing he did was tell them that he wanted the next two weeks off of being on call - our anniversary is this week on Thursday and then dd's bday is next weekend - I couldn't believe he did that - and his boss said he had definately earned the time off of being on call -

a day at the beach

and I am slightly sunburned!!!

we went and purhased our fireworks - lots and lots of fireworks -

then there was the lightning storm!

I am scared of lightning - I have been hiding all night - in a room with NO windows so I can't see any of it!

I love the valley

fear

Someday I fear - I will awaken and realize it was all a dream -


I found the rawest of emotions that surge over the recesses of my soul are as turbulent as the waters that pound away the mightiest of stones at the land's edge into the finest of sands that are washed away by the very waters that created them. Yet those same emotions are as gentle as the softest breeze that swirls the scent of cherry blossom with the clean smell of rain and gently caresses the weathered cheek bringing a smile to the aged face on a warm evening -

To imagine that in a world those emotions are hidden so far that they are nearly unrecognizable to the hearts that are pierced by them - it is feared the emotions that light such a passion stem from the same heart that feels guilt sets forth to extinguish those flames.
-

Someday - I fear I will awaken and realize it was all just a dream and that life really is not the way it seems - happiness - in its purest form is just a fleeting fantasy and that the harsh reality of the world is glaring through and reflected in the mirrors that once reflected serenity.

-

I fear that this is a short-lived spell and that once reality hits - my world will once again crash around me -

And that is my deepest fear

My new slogan

Your Slogan Should Be

Rainyd - Delightfully Tacky, yet Unrefined

http://www.blogthings.com/theslogangenerator/">The Slogan Generator

Heartbreak

I am the tears of the lonely woman

I am her sorrows



I am her frustrations


I am the loneliness that haunts her



I am her constant companion



She wishes she could escape



She tries to leave but I always follow



My name is heartache I will never leave

I have a friend

I have a friend - of the male species - yes I said species because they may also be human but they are so different from the female - that they are a species of their own!!!

okay back to my friend -

For the first time in over 13 years, I have allowed myself to have a male friend. Not a boyfriend - I am already married - lest you forget. This friend has quickly become one of my dearest friends in the world. I feel like I can sit and chat with him and his wife for hours - actually I know I can because I have. It is so nice to have a likeminded friend who sees much of the world the same way I do. We are both social work students and unlike all the females in the class I am very logic minded - I guess on some level my mind works on the same scientific logical level as the male brain. - It is nice not feeling like I can talk to someone and not worry about worrying about emotions. This friend was the FIRST male I ever felt safe enough with to be more than aquaintances with.

However - I have noticed over the past couple of weeks - this friend has pulled out of the friendship. I am a little confused by this - I miss our friendship - however - I am going to make a wild stab in the dark and guess that he feels guilty for being close friends with a woman who is not his wife. I dont know how to tell him that I don't want a deeper relationship with him - I just enjoy our time hanging out - I miss him -

so I guess I go back to only having girlfriends - pity

for anyone who might read this blog tonight

I am asking for prayer for an event that is going to happen tonight. I am sorry that I am being criptic but this is one of those unspoken prayer requests. Pray for a good outcome from what is going to happen and that the information recieved is taken as it is meant to be taken.

Tonight's events have the power to impact many lives - lets pray that it is for the positive

I got to meet a blogging buddy!!!

a few months back I made contact with a fellow blogger. I had lurked on her blog but had not posted until I realized that she worked at the school for social work in Colorado. Since I am a social work student I felt enough of a connection to email her and since then our friendship has started to grow.

This last week I had a whirlwind trip into Wyoming to pick up my son. During this time I drove 2200 miles in three days. I still don't think I have fully recovered from it.

I had to opportunity to drive a bit out of my way - about 200 miles each way actually - to meet Dawn. (her link is in my sidebar). We had a wonderful visit. It almost didn't happen. I was nervous and almost decided against it. However my son, in his 15 years of wisdom (haha) asked me when I was ever going to have this chance again. I am glad that I listened to my son. We were very blessed to get to spend this time together.

Beautiful

There and back again - a mommy's tale

I left monday - drove to wyoming

got my spud

tuesday - went to colorado - breathtaking beauty

wed - home again home again jiggie gig!!!

More details when I am rested

most important detail - my spud is now home with me - FOR GOOD!!!

My day

Today started out like any other typical saturday - get up - work out - shower and goof around - get some housework done and do a little bit of shopping with one of my girls :)

However that all happened before noon - my afternoon was not a typical saturday -

Today I attended an EZ Defense for Women classl. I thought that since I am going into a field that requires me to deal with potentially violent people I need to be able to defend myself.ll

What an amazing experience!!!

There were two teachers - two assistants and then 3 students - it was a very small group and we got a lot of one on one time with the instructors.

I felt totally empowered and feel safer and more assured than I have for years. The first thing I learned was how to defect an unwanted hug without alientating the potential hugger - WOW - that seemed to be written into the script just for me!!! I loved it

I definately recommend self defense courses - what an amazing experience!

a little MEME

In your entire life, have you ever...

...gone on a blind date? Nope – I prefer to know who I am going with

...skipped school? Yup – even as the president of the geeks club (hehe) I have skipped a few classes

...watched someone die? Yes – when I was 15 one of my friends from up the road died in my arms - and then my grandmother passed away 5 years ago – I was by her side holding her hand

...been to Canada? When I was in Job Corps we would go to Canada a lot – it was a lot of fun

...been to Mexico? nope

...been to Florida? Nope .

...been on a plane? Yes – not a big fan – they need better seatbelts


...been lost? Physically ? I can’t recall being really lost – I knew where I was, just no one else did – Mentally? A lot, especially lately! …. Spiritually??? – yes

...been on the opposite side of the country? Yes a few times –

...gone to Washington, DC? No but would love the opportunity - I have a few things to say to a few polititians

...swam in the ocean? Well I wouldn’t call it swimming – more beached whale – I was PG only time I swam in the ocean

...had your booze taken away by the cops? Nope

...lettered in a high school sport? Lettered in Softball –

...cried yourself to sleep? More times than I care to admit

...played cops and robbers? Oh yes – one of our favorite games as a kid

...played dolls? A few times

...recently colored with crayons? Yes – I love to color – I use my niece visiting as a chance to color again

...sang Karaoke? Quite badly I might add!

...paid for a meal with coins only? yeah

...done something you told yourself you wouldn't? yeah

...cheated on an exam? Nope – I want my grades on my own merit not someone else’s J

...made prank phone calls? My sisters did all the time – I was to chicken

...laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose? Yeah

...caught a snowflake on your tongue? Yup

...danced in the rain? As often as possible

...written a letter to Santa Claus? Yup

...been kissed under the mistletoe? That sounds vaguely like romance - not happening in my lifetime

...watched the sunrise with someone you care about? On a few occasions

...been arrested? Nope

...blown bubbles? What mommy hasn’t?

..gone ice-skating? Nope

...been skinny dipping outdoors? Can’t say as I have

...had a nickname? RainyDazed – RainyD – bRainy

...been to Africa? Nope, never really have had the desire to go – I am happy to stay in my little piece of heaven J

...eaten cookies for dinner? Yup – probably have

...been on TV? I have been in two commercials – one for a coffee shop and one for a massage therapy clinic J

...stolen any traffic signs? I plead the 5th?

...been in a car accident? Backed into another vehicle – wasn’t my fault he was exceeding speedlimit by 20plus mph




What is your....

...mother's name? private

...favorite drink? COFFEE – COFFEE – COFFEE!!!

...favorite alcohol? Don’t really have a favorite – but I enjoy copper camels on occasion

...birthplace? Idaho

...favorite vacation spot? In a mountain somewhere -

...favorite salad dressing? Ranch mixed with Salsa

...favorite pie? Huckleberry

...favorite number? 27 – I don’t know why – just is

...favorite movie? Must Love Dogs, Saving Private Ryan, The divine secrets of the YaYa sisterhood, Pirates or the Caribbean (all of them) and Lord of the Rings (all of them)

...favorite holiday? One that I get to spend my family with

...favorite food? I don’t really know - I love salads -

...favorite day of the week? Mondays

...favorite brand of body wash? Irish Rain Aloe

...favorite toothpaste? Aquafresh

...favorite smell? The air right after it rains – or lilacs




Do you have any...

...tattoos? two orange roses formed to make a heart and a dragonfly

...body piercings?
My ears




Do you drive a 2-door or 4-door vehicle?
4 doors

What do you do to relax?
Work on computers, spend time with friends

How do you see yourself in 10 years?
hmmm - career wise - I will a MSW and will be working with an agency that handles adoption – foster, foreign and domestic
personally - I see me being in great shape -

Feel free to join the fun - it's great to learn more about you. Let me know if you do it!